Along with my mostly optimistic outlook on life...... I've been crying A LOT, over small stuff and big stuff... and extremely stupid stuff..... WHY?
I realized its because I am no longer able to STRESS EAT... with this last fill I am no longer able to cram shit down my throat because of life events...... When I do.. it is not satisfying and I end up over the toilet spitting it out. Finding a new outlet for my stress is something I must do. Because me being a total irrational biotch to those I love and work with will not cut it.......
The obvious answer is exercise........... but come on let me be real....... I haven't developed the love affair with exercising that oh so many have...... I don't ever see me having an orgasm over a good brisk run.... I wish. LOL
OK... so I'm going to post a pic from Last December...... It was taken at my sons skating party and I thought I looked pretty cute until I saw the following pic......... I wasn't even at my heaviest yet...... Also a pretty embarassing thing happened at this party...... I got down on the floor in the center of the rink to re tie my son's skate, and I could NOT get my fat ass up.... The skates kept moving out from under me and I had to ask a little size 0 teeny bopper to help me up......... she freaked out thinking that I had fallen, she asked if she needed to call someone.. I said NO.. just give me a hand....(this completely tore down any piece of confidence I had) I was the fat mom who had a young outgoing spirit in a fat waddling body.......... that version of me is gone....... I'm getting there...... BRING ON THE DAMN SKaTES!
Me trying to keep my balance and look cute..........
Never again will I BE that woman!
December 2006
December 2, 2007........
Wearing my beloved size 12 Levis and a Size Large Shirt
