Wednesday, July 15, 2009

So...... I've regained


Lets see........

today 214. This shit has got to stop. Do I need a FiLL? HELL YES

Did I call for a Fill? Hell NO

Have you been eating slider Foods? HELL YES
Have you been eating ice cream daily? F'ng YES

OK... so I'm back to blogging.... facing my violets on LBT and facing the scale.

I need to take a different approach I guess....

2.5 years banded and yes I'm happy that the capris I'm wearing today are 14's, but I am so pissed off at myself that my size 10's WAYYYYY to small.

Here is a head shot of me...... TODAY.. a few minutes ago......

Look at how fat my face is compared to my profile pic up in the corner of this page.

I need to pick myself up and get a f'ng grip

Here we go.

5 comments:

Donna said...

YOU GO GIRL! You can do this!! :)

Amanda Jane Grace said...

Tracy, this is Lunasa from LBT.

I'm upset for you. Not because you've regained, but because you're so angry at yourself. I know how you feel. Please don't compare your "fat face' to another time your face looked better to you. Don't call your face fat at all, Be kind to you. You will never get off the merri-go-round if you hate on yourself so much.

Is your weight trying to tell you something? I've realised my yo-yo-ing weight is actually a very clever part of me trying to get my attention. Why? because my life is a bit of a mess...Not to the outside, but the way I live my life is a mess... I am avoiding confronting myself over certain things and I am eating in response to that 'cover up'

What else is going on with you? Why won't your weight let you move on? Why are you hiding behind what has become a compelling hunger?

Forget the diet for a moment, forget hating on yourself, try & find the conflict you're obviously carrying around....

It makes me sad to read your posts, I see through your words, I see pain...what is it?

Amanda

The "new" Katie! said...

Tracy... don't be upset!! We are all here to help!!!!
I have my bad days too!

Have you looked into the REBOOT program??? it seems to be pretty darn neat!! keep us updated!

Last Option Atty said...

Hi there! I am looking forward to an update I hope you check back in soon. I am 6 months out and down 30 pounds and you hav ebeen helpful to me on my ourney. This is when you need to reach out and be real about what you are going thru we are here to support you I have been reading your journey on and off for a few months and you have been very very helpful. You know what to do and have the tools one step at a time and you'll be back on track 100% Can I ask why you have not gone for a fill? Also how is your Mom doing?

vermonster05488 said...

Hey Tracykins - Fellow bandster here. Just started new thread on Lapbandtalk.com and you need to read my entries. I'm in the same boat and just finished beating myself up over there. Trying to get things back on track for myself. Started 244 down to 144 now over the last 7 months gained 22 pounds back. We need each other. Let's do it!